Exasperation

*rolls eyes* Somtimes I juz feel its damn unfair. U make it sound as though we r the bad guys here who dun value u as a fren and hence sometimes "conveniently" fail to ask u out whenever we go out together. This is juz damn annoying. U told me that U were unhappy the first few times but then U got used to it.
I wonder how would U feel if everytime u asked a fren out, the fren rejects U on one basis or another? Actualli, its onli 2 diff reasons, either one of which everytime. One being u have to accompany ur stead. Two, U dun like our choice of activity. Different people have different priorities in life. Yeah, I dun pretend to understand y u choose to be completely obessed with one priority at the expense of the others but I respect ur choice and value judgment.
Well, every choice that u make has consequences. U cant put all ur tender loving care into taking care of one plant and making it bloom... while leaving another plant alone and expect that plant to be blooming by itself when u have the that once in a blue moon moment to turn to it.
True, sometimes its our fault that we forget to ask you. But there r mani instances where we alreadie noe U r not available. At the risk of making excuses, I would tell u how disheartening it is to be told time and again u r unavailable for our little gatherings. Pls pause and ask urself this qn. Of all the gatherings that we did ask U to come along, how mani have u gone for? Then ask yourself, how mani did u not go for?
Have u ever thot of going along for one activity becos U enjoy our company even though U din like the choice of activity? Its tough to find different activities each time to please everyone.
I guess what I m reallie trying to say is that there is no free lunch in this world. Everyone needs to put in effort in order to make this frenship work.
Okies, i end my rantings here.

Word again

The room was cold.
Yet it was incomparable to the icy feeling in his heart.
He was alive, was he?
His eyes were riverted, he couldnt tear his eyes away.
Never had he known such loss, he hoped never again to noe such pain.
The face that had smiled at him over the years would smile no longer.
The body that had protected him over the years was forever immobilised.
A pale shadow of his former self he was, yet he would never be viewed as any different.
He yearned to look upon that face forever, yet he knew it was no longer possible.
She wept beside him but strangely enuff, he refused to.
Death had come unwelcome perhaps but undoubtedly for the best.
Life had inflicted much pain and suffering but it had finally ended.
Weeping wasnt about the strong or the weak.
Was it reallie necessary?
He smiled at all the eternal memories that he would forever cherish.
He would remember him in the way he should be.
The memory would forever be etched in his mind and heart.
A great heart and a bright smile.

Its been a long time since i blogged man. Sigh lazy to even type rubbish. Anyway, since i promised someone that i would blog, here i am~! The hols r reallie flying past... it seems to have barely started but yet half the hols r gone. B4 I know it, it will probably be back to the books again. Sigh.
The hols have been fulfilling. Met up with many frens and planning to meet up many more. How i wish i could savour this freedom forever. Oh well i suppose this freedom is more valuable since it is so limited.
An update on what I have been doing. Watched Narnia and King Kong. Narnia was more touching i suppose but it din reallie live up to the book. King Kong has a lousy plot( i mean wat else do u expect frm King Kong?) but great effects and motion scenes - plus its a steal at 186 mins:P
Been planning to do some shopping but never can seem to get down to it with all the christmas crowds around. Dunch reallie feel like jostling and squeezing with other pple.
Trainings have been limited due to my fractured ankle.. im more of there for moral support since i cant reallie train. A quick summary of my past week... mahjong, badminton, tennis, supper at geylang, training, town, dinner at queenstown, Malaysia :)
Im reallie grateful to those who have been around for me forever. Its a great feeling to noe tat i can always rely on all of u. The one who toked to me for ages at the bottom of my flat after driving me home, the one who always passes notes to me and keeps lazy old me from procrastinating, the one whom i have played vball with for ages with and hang out with often, the kokster ones that i always play bball with and go out gai gai-ing with, the one who is always concerned and ready to listen to my complaints and grumbles, the one who is abroad but yet I remain in close contact with, the one whom i always hit the gym and pool with (congrats on ur new founded happiness!), the one who accompanied me to get my passport done and ended up waiting for a damn long time =p
Thank U.

Its been 3 days since the exams ended and i feel.. Empty. Its amazing reallie. During the monotonous preparation leading to the exams, I often fantastied about how happy and excited I would be after they were over. Although this would probably shock people, yes, Life feels empty without the constant thought of work and exams. Im not saying tat I mug a lot but at the least, it was hovering in the background - something that u eventually had to get down to in the end.
Yes, whenever I wake up and realise to my horror *yah rite* I have the whole day to myself, I feel totally lost.
This is so totally my fault. I should have arranged many activities beforehand like so many of my frens instead of starting to arrange onli after exams finish. Bah. With trainings, coachings and work coming up, its a big question mark whether I will have time to go out eventually.
Grr.. I need to get drunk. I need to get a life:P